wii, you suck

my parents got a wii for christmas this year.  strike that, Santa brought the Bee Family a wii for christmas this year.  but ever since all the kids went back to their respective schools/lives/etc, and since poppa bee's doctor told him to lose twenty pounds, momma and poppa bee have been wii-fitting their ways through their days.

dad claims to have lost ten pounds already by wii-ing. apparently, it's working for people in the UK, too. that woman lost one-full-miss-bee size using the wii. she lost an entire ME using her wii. it must be working. and it's way cheaper than the gym or yoga class.

i was mostly curious about this wii yoga and what my parents were doing weighing the dog on the wii. sure enough, little Buddy Beealge has his own mii. so i spent a ruckus saturday night creating a little mii with mom and dad.

so i've got my cute little mii-bee ready, and i've made it small and skinny and then it weighs me and tells me that i'm perilously close to being underweight. the wii then proceeds to tell me to GAIN fifteen pounds. that is my goal - GAIN weight. i have one month, the wii warns. it'll be asking for mii. so i'm already annoyed with the mii for telling me stupid things, when it decides to test my wii-age with a series of balance tests. mind you, this is the first time i have ever stepped on the stupid wii fit balance board. so i try to hang tough, but i failed at the third test. out of five. and it didn't even let me try tests four or five. and DUN-DA-DA-DUM! my wii fit age is FORTY THREE.

oh, bite me, wii fit. forty three? you're a sham and your mother is a sham. you just called me nicole richie and now you're telling me that i'm a middle-aged woman? psht.

for the record, i took the wii age test the next day and got 20. that's still an average of 31.5, which i am NOT happy about.